When getting answers means testing

cirqueplayAll throughout my life I’ve always had medical oddities which have refused to be classified and that I end up being told that they couldn’t find the problem. Or, that the problem is there, but it literally can’t be classified when they test it and they can’t put a name on what happened to me. Generally this is skin related where I get a classified unknown diagnosis, and when every time I go to the doctor I don’t get an answer has to be something pretty disastrous for me to turn to the hospital for answers.

My husband was trying to explain my aversions to hospitals, but I told him that generally if you are a woman you can handle a large amount of pain without complaining. It’s like we are literally programmed for that, going through life taking stuff without blinking an eye.

So, with my visit to a neurologist I wasn’t too surprised when they told me they didn’t have a clue what brought it in, what it is, and anything until they test me.

Brain MRI testing, it just sounds terrifying. I’ve had MRI testing before, and even heart tests as a kid, but the brain seems so much more… Scarier, for some reason. I don’t know quite what to say when they ask me about symptoms and what might have triggered it:
I had a banana right beforehand.
I was drinking lots and lots of water because I know you get dehydrated on flights.

They then ask you what happened to you, and I answer them like how I did on the flight, “Well you know the most unimaginable pain ever and when they say they could get you oxygen on the plane you really wish they said venomous snakes to put you out of your misery???? Um, like that.”

The Doctor was so straight laced, and nice, that I felt awkward trying to interject some humor into the conversation especially since my head was killing me and jingling purses sounded like nails on a chalkboard. I’m oddly aware of perfume and how it’s like a vice around my nose and brain, and all of the high heels in the hospital hallway was making me want to push toilet paper in my ears.

I’ve done that before, wet toilet paper in the ears to drowned out sound… And it didn’t work out well when I did it the last time so I was getting pretty desperate with my headache. Luckily I got out of there without randomly yelling and only moderate twitching.

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  1. I’m not sure exactly what you’re referring to here, but my husband once had a terrible headache come on so quickly when his plane was landing. His ballcap caused some of the vessels around his head and face to constrict due to the altitude change when the plane lowered to land and he fought it for a day or so. Perhaps something occurred during landing that hasn’t righted itself?

    • The headache had the weird symptoms attached to it of feeling like my arms were disconnected from my body, my vision blackening, the numbness, it was just so much and the worst ever and lasted for hours and hours without getting any better. Right now I am back to normal, but it seemed like my body was so wiped out from the ordeal that I had the troubles with my appetite, balance, focusing on peoples faces, standing, walking, etc. I am just thankful that it has gone away like nothing happened! 🙂

  2. You are being written into my prayer journal right now! I’ll be praying for you!!! Keep us posted… and I hope you are feeling much better soon. The testing might be terrifying, but you can go through it. You’re even stronger than you know! Hang in there… and I am sending you hugs from New England!!

    • Thank you dear, you are very sweet! I am feeling better and stronger and thanks for the hugs! Definitely very thankful to be doing better and to heal from whatever ‘it’ was. 🙂


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