Call me an unlucky unintentional klutz

I really don’t know what is wrong with me sometimes, if I truly am a klutz, of if I’m just unlucky… or if I’m a little of  both. I hurt my big toe on my right foot a month or more ago and it just started to not bother me as much and I got back into the swing of things. I went to the fitness room to do some cross fit action on one of the machines and then yesterday I went to the batting cages with the man. I was feeling good, and even had my steel toed boots on to prevent any accidents again with the ball hitting my toe and causing that whole mess that happened last time.

Everything was looking good, I went to swing for the last ball, missed, went to take a step, and landed right on my side. My ankle gave out and I tumbled onto the concrete with my bat slipping out from my hand. All I remember is that intense pain from my ankle dislocating, going to grab it with my one hand, and pulling my foot back into position.

And screaming, I was screaming at the top of my lungs bloody murder style.

There were two kids there that I remember their looks on their faces like it’s seared into my brain. There was confusion on their faces as well as just shock after I had stopped screaming and my ankle slipped back into normal place. My husband ran over and he offered me his hands to get back up on my feet. I took his hands and he offered me his shoulder as I tried to walk. My head started swimming and I only went a few steps before I just felt like I was going to pass out from the pain. It was probably one of the worst times it has happened to me and I’ve been spraining/dislocating both my left and right ankle since I was seven years old.

I wake up today and it’s still swollen and I’m just feeling… deflated. I was so excited about going back to the batting cages, getting my butt back up on that crazy cross fit machine, and the sensation that my body was mine again without pain. And now I have constant, leg shaking, pretty consuming pain back again with my left ankle being hurt from just stepping to the side and it going out. Whenever I’m prepared for my ankle maybe going out, it never happens. But when I’m walking, going down stairs, getting out of the car, or even just sleeping, it happens.

I can’t even walk around the apartment without severely hobbling and I am sure I look super pathetic. It will heal, and it may take longer, yet it still frustrates me and I want it to be over with as fast as possible. I want my body back again without that stupid pain that forces me to limp and stops me from doing things I love.

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