Do you want children? Uhhh…

There is something that I can’t quite deny, and when the fiancée asked me when we first starting dating I gave him a “Yeah” when I was thinking more “Maybe.” He asked me if I wanted kids, and I kind of fumbled a bit, recovered, and said a sorta yeah in response. Truth be told I’m the baby out of my family and have never grown up with anyone younger than me so the whole kid thing doesn’t come naturally. On his side of the family they reproduce like rabbits so there are children being born all the time and his family on both sides is huge.

Yeah, his family has them beat!

He likes to say that with the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding and their ‘big’ family doesn’t even compare to what his family is like. Which, I met them (not all of them, just one side of his family) and he is definitely right.

My mother doesn’t have any family, her father was the last of her family, her mother died when she was younger and before I was born, so I just have my father’s side and I don’t get along with them. The children question gets my heart beating like someone is trying to run me over with a car and I don’t know quite how to respond. I’m still young, I want to travel, but with our age difference I know I must have kids eventually, I’m just not sure when. It’s a hot button topic, when I respond in my unsure way to the question when people ask me they don’t understand why I hesitate and fumble.

I do know that, deep down, I do like kids. I did a ton of volunteer work with kids when I was a teenager and enjoyed it very much. I also know with babysitting three little girls when I was younger that I have strong mother instincts that kick in. The girls were chasing me around when I was babysitting one time, which was a usual thing, and the littlest one fell down. I went straight into save child mode where I wrapped her up in a blanket, delegated the older one to get an ice pack, and basically held her until her mom got home.

I just know that having children is not easy, and changes your life completely. It’s not a decision to be made lightly, and I still have a few more years where I want to prepare myself for it.

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3 Comments

  1. There’s no rush with these things. I’d also love to have kids, but not too soon! 🙂

    Reply
  2. Dan Clark

     /  January 26, 2012

    I have a hard time wanting to have kids. I feel like I’ll want to have them more when I get older and finished with school and in a nice career. I live in Utah where the pressure to have kids is really intense. Yuck!

    Reply

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