Moving to my own beat

I’ve always been that type of person to move/grove/dance to my own beat. This has brought about a cause/effect that is quite like this: People either dig my weirdness or they find me to be like a two-headed dragon. They just don’t know how to handle me, what to say to me, they look at me with this disgust that I see their upper lip curl when I talk, dance, or basically breathe sometimes. This is incredibly hilarious to me and I make sure that these people get thoroughly annoyed by me. I am not changing for them, or anyone else for that matter.

Well, maybe I will for the man, but that isn’t on my awesomeness that is me, it’s more my money issues and how I tend to freak out and have control issues over it.

Having kind of messed up family, and a mother and father fighting constantly from the moment I could remember I’d try to find ways to escape. This would be mainly through my imagination. I didn’t talk much, but with my stuffed animals I’d play with them for hours and be entertained. You couldn’t get anywhere sending me to my room without TV and think that this was a success. My mind was already back in my room playing dinosaur and pretending I was a triceratops. They would be screaming at the top of their lungs at each other, like they currently did today, the moment they saw each other it was an argument.

As I grew older, and would still steal away to my bedroom and pretend my plastic horses were in a race as I inched them forward one after another I realized playing with animals was not teenager behavior. Thus, I came across music. To cover up the screaming I’d hear I would play my music as loudly as I could. The lyrics became my anthem. My memory clutched on to each word and songs I’d listen to during those years I know word for word and could say today without messing it up.

Of course, my memory is so good that I don’t own a radio, can hear a song once, and basically know every word to the song.

The girls at work find this fascinating. One gal actually peeked inside of my car to see if I was telling the truth of the missing radio. This was not a lie, I don’t own one, I’ve been too lazy to get one with my downgraded car. I love singing, but I’m incredibly self-conscious about it. While getting jiggy with it comes with ease, my plan with singing is to pretend I’m worse than I am. Not only would I blast my music when I was younger, but that would include singing in the tub/shower.

Now there will be an even better escape with the form of me going on a vacation. Las Vegas, to be exact. I can’t wait and hope I can get some crazy getting down with it dance moves at one of the clubs.

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  1. OMG people think I am totally weird too…. where is the section in the cafeteria high school for the weird yet totally cool chicks?!?! No where I tell you !!!

    • I was so weird that I wasn’t even allowed over by the weird table, but rather I’d just eat at my desk and hang out by myself. I know, the weird, cool chicks didn’t have anywhere to go!


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