No more gambling for you!

The fiancée stupidly lost $300 today because he went to a place to gamble and, of course, lost. While he was losing money, I was making money. I will be working every single day this week, and for the whole stupid walk thing we have going on this weekend, I’m not sure if I will be there for it, because that will mean that I will be 9 days in a row. Today was rough, not because I was super busy, but rather it was the fact that everything finally caught up with me and then I had to spend 1-on-1 time with my mom and she was super crazy.

Super crazy, because she’s been cooped up the last few days and she can’t leave the house. She’s incapable of going out by herself, can’t stand my father, so she ends up not eating/going anywhere/won’t leave the house for the entire day. So, she was in rare form, frantically talking a mile a minute and making fun of me for how tired I was. Which is ridiculous, I never bother her about when she’s tired, yet I get shit constantly and she can’t stop jabbing me for not having the energy or the ability to keep my eyes open.

I was quite proud of myself with how I handled the fiancée losing his money stupidly through gambling. I guess I can look at it as if I was a normal woman that I’d go retail therapy shopping or eating if I didn’t feel that well. His mother is going into surgery, work has been a beast for him, and we won’t see each other for probably only 2 days this week with him being out of town. He wants to be there to take care of his mom and be there for her for the surgery so we haven’t been able to even talk over the phone he’s been so busy… and I’ve been pretty busy myself too.

I know that I have to work through my whole money issue when I get married to the man. All my family has ever done is fight about money, where it’s going, who has spent it, what it’s been on, so I don’t want to be doing this with him. But, I did let him know no more gambling, which he said that he wouldn’t. We have a lot of stuff to pay for, together, such as an apartment, the mattress, the wedding, the reception, our honeymoon, etc. that he can’t just be blowing money just because he thinks it’s fun. He has an issue with that, we are two very separate people when it comes to money.

He spends, I save. I save like a crazy person waiting for apocalypse to happen or something terrible to hit me at any moment. Sometimes, I worry about whether the differences between our perception of money will be an issue. But, I do know that he and I seem to work things out really well when we do have a conflict, so that’s a very good thing. We aren’t manipulative, passive aggressive, we listen to each other when there’s an issue and I know that’s why we can make it through arguments. I know that is also the reason why I love him, he doesn’t hold it against me, I don’t feel like I need a shield to protect myself if I need to discuss something serious because he will throw verbal daggers at me and say it’s my fault for how I feel.

That’s what my mother does, it’s always my fault, there are no apologies, no nothing. But, I miss him a lot… which is part of the reason why I am working myself to death, to keep my mind occupied.

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2 Comments

  1. For every spender in a relationship there needs to be saver.
    Opposites attract. You may not know this but you are his hero… or will be!

    Reply
    • Well, I guess that’s true! You need to have that kind of check and balance in a relationship. If you never spent you probably would never have a good time, but if you always spent then you would never have enough money to have any good times! Aww, I like the idea of being a hero, thank you!

      Reply

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