Me + Jeans = My Personal Hell

I went shopping yesterday… jeans shopping. There is something I really have to force myself to do is strip off my old jeans and force myself into new ones. And when I say force, I do mean force. I always think it’s so funny when you watch T.V. shows where the character has one foot in, one foot out, bracing themselves against the wall as they try to hop up and down and force their junk in.

Fortunately it was much better than that. Unfortunately I tried on some low rider jeans.

Low rider jeans are not my friend. I don’t get them, I bent down to grab something in the dressing room and flashed myself in the mirror my wonderful ass crack. My hips are my widest point, especially when they sit that low on the waist. They look cute from the legs up but once you get to the not-so-hidden muffin top waiting to explode out from captivity you know there is an issue. I like stuff that falls at my waist line and shows off that my belly, though it’s still a woman’s belly so it’s certainly not flat, is not that bad. So, low rider jeans would normally stop me on my quest but I pushed on and found some that sat at a decent level on my waist.

My mom likes to dress me up like a doll. She loves buying me clothes… I hate trying them on. I’ve only gotten into shopping in recent years, and the main appeal to me about it is that I look, get bored, and move on. Well, yesterday I wasn’t resenting trying on clothes as much as I usually do so we went to two of the same stores in different locations.

 I got some shoes (I don’t know why I get them, shoes always hurt me and I’m not woman enough to wear them when they start eating my heel off slowly but surely). I just recently got into shoes, it’s kinda like a new kitten, it’s so cute and adorable and then you take it home and it starts tearing apart your home. Replace your home with my toes, heels, ect. and my highly sensitive feet which seem to be allergic to adorable and sexy shoes. I got these sexy sandal wedge shoes that make me 6 feet tall. It made me feel like an amazon woman prowling around so I ended up getting them… and they were only $6, not bad.

I got a flower for my hair that I’ll be wearing at work. It’s super cute and doesn’t annoy me too much. Many things annoy me, especially with clothes and accessories. I have very little patience for it so if it’s not working I am more than willing to get rid of it and move on.

It was surprisingly not too painful shopping, go figure. We’ll see if the girls at work make fun of me for the girly flower, if so, I’ll ditch it for the day.

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