My husband asked me this just a day ago randomly while we were in the car together. It’s officially been a year since we moved and I could never imagine all the changes we went through as a married couple, or for me, within myself. I know I’ve disappeared for a while but life got a little crazy there and I was having a had time keeping up, let alone writing it down.
I have gone on two more trips since my last one I wrote about. My husband and I have a trip planned for this month as well that neither of us have been to. My mother and I will be traveling to someplace we’ve never been to before, and I have always dreamed of going there since I was a kid. Luckily, whatever happened to me neurologically has disappeared and there’s been no signs of it coming back. But, I’m always worried now when I get too stressed that it might fall apart again.
I’m always thankful to be working especially since the journey to become employed after moving was hard, arduous, and extremely discouraging at times. Having a job here does make me settle more into this place, it begins to take on more of a home vibe especially with our pet bunny.
There’s some times lately where I wish I could go out with one of my work friend’s back home, get a martini, and just talk and catch up like we can do so easily. There’s this problem of trust that I keep my personal life just that… extremely personal. Throughout life I’ve always been that one strange, oddball kid who never cared to have friends, nor needed them. I’d have more fun playing make-believe by myself, I was shy, yet in the same sense loud and outgoing.
Friends are not something I make in a day, it takes years just for me to feel comfortable enough to let someone scratch the surface of who I am. Yet, I have never held onto a friend for years and we always seem to grow apart. At times I wish it was easier for me, like when I’m craving martini times and my friends I trust are miles and miles away. That’s why I think I’ve taken up blogging at a young age when I first discovered it and keeping it anonymous as best as I can. I think way too much, I’m extremely analytical, and it helps to write it down and let it out there.
I do think about my friends when my husband asks me if this place feels like home now. In many senses I think it is clicking that I am connecting more with where we moved. I feel a lot more relaxed with the sights, the sounds, the people, and having a job grounds me. This place is feeling a lot more like home and I’m trying my best to embrace it.